The correct use for modern art galleries

Last year Paul Joseph Watson came up with one of his best videos that attempted to answer a simple question: why is modern art so... terrible?

And here, about 15 months later, is the sequel:

PJW is, of course, entirely correct to castigate modern art. There is nothing uplifting about it, nothing that forces you to question your own ideals. There is almost no skill involved; if any idiot can make "art" out of a wheely bin filled with trash, or put on display an exhibition involving a shoe with a crumpled-up beverage can stuck to it, then all he is doing is attempting to pretend that there is more to trash than meets the eye.

Maybe that would be true if the trash in question had actual historical value- in which case, that is what TV shows like Antiques Roadshow in Britain are for. But the modern "art" that is on display in most art galleries today is just trash, end of story. It has no redeeming features whatsoever.

It takes no real thought or effort to take a giant boulder and dump it outside an art gallery. That just indicates severe laziness.

There is nothing elevating about taking an idol of the Lord Christ and dunking it in a jar of urine and then putting it on display for the world to see. That just indicates a desire to shock, not make the viewer question anything.

There is no value to be found in putting on an exhibition consisting of a room with a light switch that turns on, and then off. That just indicates a complete lack of any artistic merit whatsoever.

Now, one might reasonably ask and argue about the question, "what is art?".

I am not qualified to offer an answer beyond the classic response by Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart: "I know it when I see it". Justice Stewart was talking about pornography, but the same applies to art. (Incidentally, there are those who would argue that pornography is in and of itself an art form- which is one of the many reasons why I stay the hell away from questions of what is, and is not, art.)

I do know what I enjoy when I'm looking at art. But that makes me about as qualified to judge art as a stripper would be qualified to be a nun.

For instance, can a car be art?

TOP GEAR's answer was: yes, it can be, because the Alfa Romeo 8C has no point, purpose, or function, other than itself.

The problem with that answer is that many, if not most, of the greatest works of art were commissioned on behalf of rich patrons and organisations. The point of those works was to fulfill a contract- yet they became far more than mere expressions of commercialism.

I invite anyone who disagrees with me to look at, say, the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel:

So I clearly cannot claim to know what is art. But I can state, with absolutely certainty, what IS NOT art.

And the fact is that most modern "art", isn't. It's just shit.

It doesn't matter how you want to dress up that shit. It doesn't matter how much perfume you want to spray on that shit. It's still just shit.

And modern art galleries that insist on spending private donations and taxpayer money to store and display that shit are therefore no better than publicly funded refuse pits.

Which, of course, is EXACTLY how I treat them.

The last time I was in London, about two years ago while I was living there for a few months on secondment for my employer, I made it a point to visit the Tate Britain a few times during my time there. My favourite method of getting to my favourite art gallery in the world was to walk there, taking the long path along the Thames River from Tower Hill all the way over to past Victoria Station over to Pimlico.

It is a very nice long walk, quite bracing in a London winter, and I highly recommend taking it with a big cup of coffee in your hand to stave off the cold weather.

Of course, if you do this, you are at some point quite likely to find yourself, er, um, caught short at some point along the way.

In which case, I suggest you do what I always did: cross over to the South Bank of the Thames at the Millennium Bridge and stop by the Tate Britain's degenerate inbred cousin, the Tate Modern, housed in the shell of an old power plant.

The toilets there are, of course, free and open to the public. So there is absolutely no issue with stopping by to, as the Brits say, "spend a penny".

In other words, I treat this scion of the "modern art" world exactly the way it deserves to be treated: as a toilet.

I thoroughly encourage all of you to do exactly the same.


  1. All you have to do is take a trip through deviantart. There are many works that are entirely as edifying as the old masters, but they languish in perpetual obscurity because they do not glory in disgust.

    heck, even 'colorstudy' and 'cartoon' art can still be beautiful and brilliant.


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