Not watching that, then


The folks in charge of the films division over at Disney are evidently running out of ideas, because now they've gone and made the upcoming live-action remake of their animated classic Beauty and the Beast into a love-letter to feminists:
“Beauty and the Beast” might be a tale as old as time, but that doesn’t mean its gender politics have to be in the dark ages. 
Details are slowly trickling out about Disney’s upcoming live-action remake of the classic love story, and we’re happy to hear that there’s a feminist twist in store for Emma Watson’s Belle. [Uh... you might be, bub, but the rest of us are not interested.]
“In the animated movie, it’s her father who is the inventor, and we actually co-opted that for Belle,” Watson told Entertainment Weekly in a recent interview. “I was like, ‘Well, there was never very much information or detail at the beginning of the story as to why Belle didn’t fit in, other than she liked books. Also, what is she doing with her time?’ So, we created a backstory for her, which was that she had invented a kind of washing machine, so that, instead of doing laundry, she could sit and use that time to read instead. So, yeah, we made Belle an inventor.

There are still young girls who are not able to go to school because of cultural restrictions. Children are being married off at a young age. This inhibits their opportunities to a better life and future. 
In addition, the Beauty and the Beast actress is not far off from her role in the movie. In the movie, Belle is a vibrant young woman full of strength and passion. She lies in a conforming society and she strives to be more than that. This is why Belle is a different take on Disney‘s usual reputation of having its female characters as a damsel in distress. 
Much like Watson, her character loves to read and has goals and aspirations. This Beauty is known for her bravery, intelligence and independence. And this can scream feminism. Something that Vanity Fair even points out. 
Moreover, even Emma Watson makes it a point to evolve the character with a fresher feminist twist. Aside from the original back story, Watson adds more depth. In addition, she makes sure that her character is not just into books but also invention.
Question: does being a feminist require one to undergo a lobotomisation of the part of the brain that deals with facts, logic, and evidence?


Notice anything in that list? Like, say, how virtually EVERY SINGLE NAME is male?


Notice how it's very, very short?

That would be because just about anything of any serious note has been invented or discovered by men.

The few notable female exceptions are just that- truly exceptional. The name of Marie Curie, one of the greatest scientists ever, springs to mind. But, again, that is because Madame Curie was totally devoted to scientific analysis and exploration- and was assisted in no small part by her husband, Pierre Curie, who gets far less credit than he should for his discovery, with his wife, of radiation phenomena.

So that's the whole "amazingly talented female inventor" thing dispatched, then. Making Belle an "inventor" in the new movie is about as realistic, and approximately as palatable, as yours truly singing soprano in a dress.

(If you're about to hurl, don't worry, I find the idea even more horrifying than you do.)

Now, how about we deal with the fact that Emma Watson is playing the part of Belle?

I was recently watching one of the earlier Harry Potter movies again with my family- the second one, I think, the one that involved the giant-ass snake at the end. It's not all that bad as a movie, I suppose, but one thing in it makes my teeth stand on edge these days: Emma Watson's character, Hermione Granger.

She is quite simply insufferable.

And apparently, Miss Hermione there is not far off from what Ms. Watson is like in real life.

Now, when I noted how irritating Hermione was on film, my sister, who I am truly sad to say calls herself a feminist, retorted that "she's basically a female version of you, y'know". And she's actually right about that. As a child I was extremely precocious and quite annoyingly keen to demonstrate my knowledge of... well, anything to anybody who cared to listen.

However, smart-alecky young boys have one highly effective corrective mechanism that girls don't: if we run our mouths too hard, we get bullied for it. Sometimes mercilessly- as I was.

I'm guessing that the even more precocious Ms. Watson probably didn't have enough people telling her that her precious-snowflake opinions are not actually that interesting to most others when she was young. That would explain why she thinks that she needs to inject more feminism into Disney's already highly feminised take on a traditional fairy tale.

This movie is going to be one of the clearest demonstrations ever recorded of the Third Law of Social Justice: SJWs always double-down.

The animated Beauty and the Beast was successful because Belle's intellectual appetites did not get in the way of her feminity. She was bright and a voracious reader, to be sure- but she was also pretty, pleasant, warm, and caring. That film showed that a good woman can bring joy to a man's life, and can change him from a self-centred egotistical jackass into a good and decent human being.

That is right, correct, and completely in line with observable reality.

The new film is going to insist on taking a not particularly attractive (in my personal opinion) actress who is clearly a feminist and borderline SJW, and letting her force her own feminist agenda down the throats of movie-goers. They are going to force us to believe that a woman can be an inventor with her own career, in mediaeval France- where women were generally not literate unless they were part of the nobility- and is, at the same time, so beautiful and wonderful and warm and caring that she can transform a terrifying beast into a loving man.

Yeah, right.

For the record, I am not against strong female protagonists in films. I am a big fan of the Underworld film series, for instance- and not just because Kate Beckinsale looks like... well, this in skintight leather and latex:


I like the series because there is a real story in there along with all of the action and shit blowing up and vampire versus werewolf battles. I like the series because Selene's powers and abilities are explained. When she initially takes on far stronger opponents, she gets her ass kicked; then she drinks some ancient superblood and becomes far stronger and ends up winning her fights, albeit with difficulty.

She is not, in other words, a Mary Sue.

The new Belle, by contrast, looks to be every bit as much of a Mary Sue as Rey was from STAR WARS VII: A Lost Hope.

Put this new Beauty and the Beast film in the do-not-watch bin. Everything I'm seeing tells me it's going to be terrible.

Comments

  1. Hopefully, after this movie flops like Ghostbusters, Emma Watson will be rightfully discarded on the pile of has-been child actors that turn into retarded adults...where she belongs.

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