We are Forerunners. Guardians of all that exists. The roots of the Galaxy have grown deep under our careful tending. Where there is life, the wisdom of our countless generations has saturated the soil. Our strength is a luminous sun, towards which all intelligence blossoms... And the impervious shelter beneath which it has prospered.
Tom Cruise might be completely batshit insane. But damn the man can act.
I mean, OK, fine, we'd have to throw Top Gun out as a mulligan, I suppose- it's the gayest non-gay movie ever made, it's ridiculous beyond words, and the acting in it is... well, the less said about that, the better.
Still, his CV is quite spectacular. The Last Samurai remains one of my favourite period-piece dramas ever, and Edge of Tomorrow was criminally underrated, while the first Jack Reacher was one of the few films where Tom Cruise was able to show that, for all that he is an ultra-extroverted alpha male, he can in fact play highly introverted Sigmas with consummate ease.
On top of all of that acting talent, though, he also evidently has a terrifically funny sense of humour. Witness what happens when he acts out his own film career in under 7 minutes:
It's a real shame that he's still madder than a honey badger with a firecracker up its arse, though. How crazy is Tom Cruise- or should I say, Tom Crooze? This crazy: