Shorts

It's been a while since I did one of these, and I'm too lazy to write a full long post today (plus, it's really freaking hot over here). So here is an assorted selection of moonbattery that has been going around over the past few days:

Proof...


...That the Almighty does, in fact, have wickedly funny sense of humour:
An expedition to the North Pole intended to measure the effects of global warming ground to a halt this month when the scientist’s ship got blocked by the ice packs near Murmansk, Russia, reports reveal. 
The Polar Ocean Challenge set out on a two-month campaign hoping to prove that the ice at the North Pole was melting. As the expedition’s website explains, the group aimed to show “that the Arctic sea ice coverage shrinks back so far now in the summer months that sea that was permanently locked up now can allow passage through.” 
Despite their best intentions to show that the ice is melting and the temperature at the pole is higher than normal, the group has only been confronted with the exact opposite as ice continues to block their path
The website Real Climate Science notes that the Polar melt season is half over, but temperatures have not climbed high enough to sponsor a large melt off of ice. According to the site, there has not been a big melt, and ice gains seem to be very close to the amount of ice lost because temperatures near the pole have been persistently below normal this year. And at the very least, large ice floes have blocked the ocean passages around the area.
This is what happens when the SCIENCE is TOTALLY SETTLED. Because it REALLY is. No, really, it is. And you'd better believe us or we'll call you a Nazi!


An Epic of Epic Epicness

While driving an Aston Martin DB9 across France, the great philosopher Jeremus Clarksonius once described the magnificent engine roar of that beautiful car by saying, "this is how you beat the French- by shouting at them!".

It seems that one Stephen Crowder decided to take that advice a bit... literally, and used it to beat SJWs like unwanted stepchildren:



I am sorely tempted to say that the French and SJWs aren't all that different. But this would be a mortal insult to the French which, if I'm honest, they really don't deserve.

After all, even the French can be reasoned with (eventually, after enough wine and cheese have been consumed). SJWs, of course, are a lost cause.

Watching Steven Crowder tear that asshole a new asshole through sheer assholishness- does that make it an ass-ception?!- is the perfect tutorial for anyone new to the alt-Right. If you want to know how we win the culture wars, look no further than that.

After all, to paraphrase that other great English philosopher, Alfred Pennyworth, some men aren't looking for anything logical... They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

So if you're up against SJWs- why hold back? Just hit them between the eyes with both barrels. Show no mercy whatsoever, for you will be offered none.

What Is It With Brazilian Chicks?!

Apparently there are two Brazilian girls entering MMA for the first time and they're having a rough time balancing out looks with skills and frankly I couldn't care less about the "skills" part:
Bellator 159 will feature the debut of two undefeated Brazilian prospects, and the similarities between them go far beyond the same first name. 
Bruna Vargas and Bruna Ellen, both talents managed by the same man, Gilbert Faria, signed with the promotion in February, and are set to take on Emily Ducote and Jessica Middleton, respectively, at Friday’s show in Mulvane. And when their manager called to inform they had signed with Bellator, they couldn’t believe it. 
"I was a bit surprised because fighting for a big promotion like Bellator is an opportunity that every fighter wants," said Vargas, "and I’m really happy about it." 
"I said wow. We didn’t hope to sign with a big promotion yet," Ellen said. "Since the beginning our goal was to sign with an international promotion, but I thought it would take more time, that I would need to fight more in Brazil. I was really happy when that happened." 
Vargas and Ellen are both 2-0 in mixed martial arts with one stoppage victory each, and another similarity between them is their physical attributes. Both fighters gained notoriety in Brazil for their beauty even before signing with Bellator, and Ellen admits that it might have helped them sign a deal with the North American company after only a couple MMA fights.
Here's what the two Brunas actually look like (probably with the help of Photoshop, of course):



The "Photoshop" aspect is kind of important, because this is hat they look like without all the touch-ups:


Still not bad-looking, at all. Even if they did lose their most recent fights, and are therefore no longer undefeated.

There is something about Brazilian women that never ceases to impress me. They seem to have a rather good mix of genetics down there.

(Unfortunately, most of the Brazilians I know are guys- we have quite a few in my martial arts school, apparently Krav Maga is actually fairly well-established down in Brazil thanks to masters like Kobi Lichtenstein and Frank Colon. Both men have strong connections to my school; the former is a very close friend of my grand master, and the latter received his black belt from that same grand master.)

On a slightly more serious note- the complaints that these two ladies have about their looks being an issue are, frankly, ridiculous.

The reality is that women's sports is as much about looks as it is talent- if not more so. There are plenty of female athletes out there who would never have gotten anything like the amount of fame and prestige and attention that they have received if it were not for their looks.

I'm thinking along the lines of Anna Kournikova, Ana Ivanovic, and Eugenie Bouchard in tennis; Danica Patrick in stock car racing; pretty much any cute blonde in women's football ("soccer" to you Americans); and Michelle Waterson, Ronda Rousey, Paige Van Zant, and a few others in WMMA.

That is not to say that these women are not skilled in their respective fields. In WMMA, in particular, one has to be rather more than just a pretty face in order to win.

But the fact is that there is nothing wrong with being a woman and also being beautiful.

Women who are blessed with spectacular looks should make the most of them. They won't last very long, on average, after all. Hot young girls should make hay while the Sun is shining, as it were, and use those looks to get whatever life will give them- which, of course, is rather a lot.

Speaking of Cute Blondes...

If you've never come across Nicole Arbour's videos, I would rather recommend starting with the one that caused SJWs to explode like that epic sequence near the end of Kingsmen:


People completely lost their shit over this video. But I didn't, mostly because I thought it was very funny and I rather liked her weirdly refreshing "ditzy cheerleader meets motivational speaker" delivery.

Her looks (more specifically, her tits) don't hurt either, obviously.

As far as I can tell, this particular cute blonde appears to be on an epic quest to become the most hated woman on YouTube. At the time of this writing, she's infuriated:
And there are quite a few others, dating back quite some time. Her... perkiness gets rather grating after only a short while, but she's quite funny up to that point- even if she's full of shit, doesn't know what she's talking about, and uses straw-man attacks in lieu of actual facts.

Hey, she's young, she's hot, and she's reasonably funny. What else does a woman need in order to succeed in life?

You Had ONE JOB, Jon!!!

UFC 200 is obviously over and done and dusted by now, but you may remember that just four days before the event was due to start, with the biggest, baddest fight card ever assembled (supposedly), a certain light-heavyweight former UFC champion popped on an out-of-competition drug test.

Well, it turns out that getting a little, shall we say, medicinal assistance is something of a trend in the Jones family:
It isn't known what Arthur tested positive for, but whatever the case, the Colts will have to go the whole of September without the man who was signed to a 5 year, $33 million contract ($16 million guaranteed) in the 2014 free agency period. The Colts should be used to it by now, because he's hardly played for them. The 30-year-old only started 3 of 16 regular season games in the 2014-15 season, having been hampered by a serious ankle injury. During the 2015 preseason, Jones suffered an injury that ruled him out for the rest of the year. Sporting News listed Arthur's contract as the worst one on the entire Colts team. 
Earlier this year, Jon's other brother Chandler was traded from the New England Patriots to the Arizona Cardinals in a surprise move. Chandler, widely regarded as one of the best pass-rushers in the league, made headlines during last season's playoffs when he was hospitalized after an apparent bad reaction to synthetic marijuana.
The Jones boys are all jonesing, it would appear.

When it comes to taking PEDs, my views on the subject are actually fairly laid-back. I think that just about every sport is full of drug users and I don't think that there is much point in trying to enforce drug bans.

After all, athletes are paid considerable amounts of money to go out there and use their God-given talents for a purpose. They are given enormously valuable incentives to be the best. They are hyper-competitive by nature, and sport is by definition the ultimate meritocracy; only the best win.

Given the incentives, and given the utterly unregulated nature of the supplement industry, is it therefore any surprise that athletes will end up taking stuff to help them perform better?

The solution to this sort of thing, in my opinion, is to have two divisions within any sport. One would be completely PED-free, with bans for life instituted for anyone found violating those rules- no excuses accepted, no appeals allowed. The other would be completely un-tested in any way. And then we'll let the people figure out what they want to watch and spend their money on.

My bet is that the "dirty" divisions would very soon far outstrip the clean ones in terms of money, viewership, and prestige- because, guess what, people want to see a spectacle. They WANT the amazing to happen in sports. They WANT to see their sporting heroes and idols perform impossible feats of physical and athletic skill.

Until then, all I can say about Jon Jones is that, while I have great respect for his fighting skills- he's probably the best fighter ever to compete in MMA- I don't have any respect for him as a person. He strikes me as a man who has been given incredible physical gifts, and who insists on throwing them away by making ever more incredibly stupid life choices.

Rob Halford Meets BABYMETAL

I'll just let this one speak for itself:


All I can say is: damn, Rob's voice has gone down the shitter!

But then, I knew that. I saw JUDAS PRIEST perform live last November. Don't get me wrong, they are one of my favourite bands EVER. I love JUDAS PRIEST's music. But I've known for years that they have long since passed their prime- which was like 25 years ago with the album Painkiller.

Ever since then, they've gone downhill a long way. Their 2008 album, Nostradamus, was so bad that I don't think I have ever listened to it all the way through.

Despite this, they are still, to this day, one of the greatest live acts ever to grace any stage. So I have to say, it's interesting to hear a J-pop band playing their classic track with such enthusiasm while the Metal God himself graces the stage.

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