Bad Puppies! Sit! Stay! Heel!

... Sod off.

And shove that newspaper you were about to whack us with up where the Sun don't shine while you're at it:
For the second year in a row, nominations for the prestigious Hugo Awards for science fiction & fantasy have been swept by the Sad Puppies & Rabid Puppies, two groups of authors and fans who oppose left-wing domination of the community. 
The Sad Puppies were formed in 2013 by bestselling author Larry Correia, amidst growing domination of the Hugo Awards by left-wing cliques — who, in 2012, successfully agitated for the cancellation of an appearance by British comedian Jonathan Ross at the awards due to fears that the entertainer might make a “fat-shaming” joke. 
Correia, along with a number of other conservative and libertarian-leaning authors, contended that a large chunk of Hugo voters voted on the basis of authors’ personal political beliefs rather than the quality of their writing. The Sad Puppies aimed to change that, by nominating authors on the basis of perceived quality rather than perceived politics. The Puppies have a particular opposition to “message fiction” — works that are primarily intended to convey a political message rather than tell a good story.
Unsurprisingly, the SF-SJWs are going into full-on rabbit mode, headsploding left and right in their desperate attempts to downplay the crushing nature of our victory:
The Puppies will no doubt be happy to take credit for the appearance of these works and others on the finalist list. But, as with “Guardians of the Galaxy” last year, their endorsement probably doesn’t count for much in the grand scheme of things. “Seveneves,” one of the most talked-about science fiction books of 2015, was already a heavy favorite for an appearance on the finalist list for best novel. 
Likewise, Gaiman’s long-awaited return to the beloved Sandman universe means his finalist listing in best graphic novel was the closest thing to a shoo-in that the Hugos have. If “The Martian” hadn’t been a finalist in its category (best dramatic presentation, long form), people would have been stunned. 
In these cases as in several others, the Puppies are running in front of an existing parade and claiming to lead it. Few who know the field or the Hugos would give the slates credit for highlighting works and authors already well-appreciated in the genre, many of which have appeared this year as finalists for other awards or on bestseller lists.  
As our Supreme Dark Overlord pointed out, it so happens that the Sad Puppies were not responsible for Mr. Gaiman's nomination- we frothing-at-the-mouth Rabid Puppies were.

It gives me great pleasure to state for the record that I was a part of this campaign. It goes without saying, of course, that neither I nor any of my fellow Vile Faceless Minions were in any way acting under compulsion or orders from Vox Day, the Supreme Dark Overlord of the Evil Legion of Evil, and that whatever we nominated was totally of our own accord and free wills. It just so happens to be a cosmic coincidence that everything we nominated was exactly the same as what our Overlord did.

For, as he likes to say, repeatedly, is he not kind?

If you look at the list of Hugo-nominated works over at the Breitbart article, and you then look at just how much of the slate for this year's awards is Rabid-nominated, you'll see immediately just how big an impact we had.

Thanks to us, a living legend of science fiction, Dr. Jerry Pournelle himself, is up for an award- and he might just win one this year, too.

Thanks to us, great talent like Cheah Kai Wai and Charles Shao will get their works showcased, as will the efforts of small independent publishing houses like Castalia House to make SF/F literature truly great again.

Thanks to us, literary classics like Space Raptor Butt Invasion will finally get the-

OK, even I couldn't keep a straight face at that last one. But you get the idea.

Indeed, in my opinion the only way that this slate could have been any better is if a certain retired US Army Lieutenant Colonel by the name of Tom Kratman were to have one of his works nominated, preferably in the Best Novel category. The Torlocks and other associated SF-SJWs absolutely loathe and fear Vox Day- but I get the distinct impression that they're actually terrified, and I mean pants-shittingly scared, of LTC Kratman.

This may have something to do with his penchant for crucifying the nastier baddies in his books. Or it may be that his tolerance for their bullshit is even lower than ours. But either way, LTC Kratman, sir, consider this a formal request: give us Book 7 of the Carrera series already, so that we can turn the 2017 awards into an outdoor barbeque party.

And surely that book must include plenty of impaling, cannibalistic UN loonies, brutally accurate and realistic depictions of the Laws of War taken to their logical conclusions, and highly enthusiastic excruciators performing their tasks- just some humble suggestions from a true fan of your work, you understand, sir.

If we could somehow contrive to get Larry Correia's signature gun-porn Monster Hunter International series on the slate alongside LTC Kratman's work, that would actually be just about the perfect day. Sadly, the International Lord of Hate decided to take the moral high road and refused to accept any Hugo Award nominations, from 2015 into perpetuity, to prove a point. He proved it, all right, but I do feel the slightest twinge of regret that we won't be seeing any of his wonderfully over-the-top works causing triggering episodes among the Torlings.

Turning to the awards themselves, I have to say that I am not entirely on board with the idea of "making science fiction great again". It's already great, it's just that the awards go to all the really rubbish books that nobody reads, the ones with "fashionable" social justice messages and nonsense. (Ann Leckie's "Imperial Radch" series, starting with Ancillary Sword, is a good example of this sort of thing, what with its "body-swapping genderless AIs in space".) Personally, I would rather just nuke the entire thing from orbit and be done with it.

But that's me. I have no real idea what Voxemort the Malevolent has in mind, but I sure as hell am looking forward to it.

As for the final list of nominees for this year's awards, there are certain Sad Puppy-nominated works on that list that perplex me to no end. STAR WARS: The Force Awakens, for instance, is in my opinion one of the worst movies that I have ever seen. I hated it. And Mad Max: Fury Road was about as boneheaded a Sad Puppy nomination as I can think of- why the hell would they vote for such an execrably stupid insult to the legacy of the Mad Max franchise?!?

It's probably fair to say that the Sad Puppies weren't entirely responsible for those two abysmally bad works being on the final list- we won't know until Chaos Horizon breaks down the voting patterns, as he has done in the past. There was undoubtedly a fair amount of push from the non-Puppies voters to get those works, as well as the works by Ann Leckie and N. K. Jemisin, on the final ballot.

But this now leaves the MidAmeriCon attendees with some very interesting dilemmas on their hands.

They are now faced with the choice of hitting multiple categories with "No Award"- probably more than the five hit last year- or accepting "Safe Space as Rape Room" and Space Raptor Butt Invasion and Jim Butcher and Vox Day as the best examples of modern sci-fi out there today. I would love to be a fly on the wall at that particular meeting.

For today, though, it is time to celebrate. For, as Conan the Barbarian would say, this is very much a taste of what is best in life:
Conan! What is best in life?!
To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women!


  1. I literally had seizures when I watched 'Mad Max: Fury Road' at the cinema.

    1. Everything I've seen about it tells me that, other than the amazing visuals, it's a dreadful movie. I didn't bother watching it at the theatres, and I haven't been able to bring myself to watch it on streaming video. And I don't see that changing anytime soon.

    2. Do yourself a favour and continue to not bother :P

      It's one long car chase with no story. Unbelievably bad, and I'm not that hard to please..

  2. Visuals are all most movies are about these days. I didn't both with Fury Road or the latest Star Wars. I knew they'd be garbage.

    I'm pleased to see that the Rabid Puppies ripped things up to a fare-the-well. I contributed also, though am not a Dread Minion.


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