It wasn’t even my boyfriend who deigned to inform me of this news – it was a study of 2,000 men asked about their ideal woman by dating app Lovoo. According to these authoritative males, the perfect girlfriend must be:– Five foot five inches tall, with 34C boobs. She must weigh 9st 2lbs and look like Kelly Brook, or at least Cheryl Cole– A brunette nurse or teacher– A Game of Thrones fan [Didact's note: There are better TV shows, but not as many with so much gratuitous nudity], but must also enjoy Coronation Street, Friends and Match of the Day– Careful with what she eats [Didact's note: Since when was this news?]– A Manchester United fan who loves Dirty Dancing– Able to get on with their mum– Adventurous in the bedroom, “happy to embark in a bit of role-play and experiment with different positions” [Didact's note: Duh, since when do real men want to have sex with the real-life equivalent of an inflatable doll?]– Happy to wear skinny jeans or miniskirts– Subtle with her make-up– Tattoo-less– P.S. Irish accents are preferableErm ... what? Is this real? Do British mean actually care this much about the women they want to date, down to this level of painstaking detail? I get that they want to date someone hot with similar hobbies to them, but WHAT ABOUT HER PERSONALITY?
Besides, what kind of men are these, caring more about their girlfriends’ diets than what she’s going to be talking about while she picks on her medium-rare steak? Clearly they’re all Manchester United fans, but more than that, they are a terrifying representation of British men who make me never want to date one again.
I doubt a continental bloke would care if his girlfriend wore skinny jeans or skirts – I bet he’d just appreciate that she was a real, live woman by his side. It is no surprise that two of the five British men surveyed, who were already in a relationship, said their current partner wasn’t the perfect woman for them.
- Men care about looks. Long hair, a nice rack, a shapely ass- these are all very clear visual signs of fecundity and fertility. I've said it before, and I'll keep saying it till the cows come home- men are programmed to find such attributes desirable.
- A woman who doesn't watch what she eats isn't going to be attractive for very long. The rare and unusual genetic exceptions aside, it's a simple fact of life that a woman gains weight as she ages. It is also a simple fact of life that a woman's looks, not her personality or intelligence, are determining factors for her social and sexual status.
- Women who pile on the makeup simply are not attractive. Back before she turned into Aunt Giggles with her attack on Rollo's SMV graph, Susan Walsh published a rather good primer on makeup as a useful mating strategy- but women who take it too far just end up looking like overpriced hookers. It's just a fact of life that excessive makeup turns men off. In another life, as a summer intern more years ago than I care to remember, I was working in Singapore for a big company and the secretary for that company was a very short woman in her late thirties or early forties who was very conscious of hitting the dreaded Wall at roughly 150mph. As a result she was extremely fussy about her looks- running 5K every day, refusing to eat carbs of any kind, and piling on the makeup to the point where she looked like a geisha as painted by Edward Munch. She was, in other words, repellent- and that was before you got to her abrasive, shallow personality.
- No matter how picky you think men are, women are worse BY MILES. Any man who has ever spent a dreary evening (pre-Red Pill) trawling through online dating profiles to find "a match" will know this. Women have quite ridiculous expectations of men, and in the West at least, most young women are so entitled, with such an unrealistic understanding of their true value and status in life, that when reality hits them over the head with a clue-bat, they simply have no idea how to respond.